After the horrifying nature of ending up paint-splattered and bitter yesterday, today took a turn for the better when natural light rapidly made it apparent that a third coat of evil white paint would not be necessary. Thank fuck for that. I have a problem with heights (I mean, I'm not terrified, and I have deliberately jumped off a bridge before, but I've also fallen out of an attic and I don't like being on uncertain ground at any height above about six feet) and sadly for me, my flat has stupid high ceilings that I can in no way reach which resulted in me clinging precariously to the top rung of a ladder that always seemed in danger of tipping over. It upset me. So no third coat meant no ladder clinging which, in turn, meant good times.

Which I celebrated by going shopping and spending £22 on fucking light bulbs. I don't even want to talk about the scowl I gifted the woman behind the till with when she announced the total. I also bought a Cadet McCoy action figure from TK Maxx though, so all was not lost.

And, after a nap, I caught up on the last three episodes of Supernatural and episode five of Stargate: Universe.

( Supernatural Ramblings )

( Stargate: Universe Ramblings )

All of these catch-up shenanigans have made me miss True Blood and Generation Kill, damnit.

Oh, and veraxia, I finally posted your parcel yesterday =)

EDIT: I just opened the fridge and immediately asked myself why the milk was sporting a Scottish flag only to almost simultaneously realise that I. Live. In. Scotland. Duh, Lorraine.

I seem to have read a fuck load of stuff in the past month. This partly down to the amount of graphic novels I went through this month but I read actual books too, honest!

198. The Invisibles: Say You Want A Revolution - Grant Morrison et. al.
199. Mikhail Bulgakov's The Master and Margarita - Andrzei Klimowski & Danusia Schejbal
200. Cycle of Violence - Grayson Perry
201. The Sandman Presents... The Furies - Mike Carey & John Bolton
202. Point Blank - Ed Brubaker & Colin Wilson
203. Sleeper: Season One - Ed Brubaker & Sean Phillips
204. The Old Man and the Sea - Ernest Hemmingway
205. Vampire Kisses - Ellen Schreiber
206. Love Story - Erich Segal
207. Tomorrow is a Stranger - Geoffrey Trease
208. Janes in Love - Cecil Castellicii & Jim Rugg
209. Connect - Nan McCarthy
210. The Three Incestuous Sisters - Audrey Niffenegger
211. The Regeneration Trilogy: The Eye in the Door - Pat Barker
212. Life Class - Pat Barker
213. The Friendly Young Ladies - Mary Renault
214. Isaac Asimov's Robots and Aliens: Changeling - Stephen Leigh
215. Isaac Asimov's Robots and Aliens: Renegade - Cordell Scotten
216. 40 Years of Original Prints - Edinburgh Printmakers
217. Model - Lee So-young
218. Cover the Mirrors - Faye L. Booth
219. Stargate: Atlantis, Angelus - Peter J. Evans
219. Twilight - William Gay
220. The Salon - Nick Bertozzi
221. The Regeneration Trilogy: Regeneration - Pat Barker
222. The Regeneration Trilogy: The Ghost Road - Pat Barker
223. 1985 - Mark Millar & Tommy Lee Edwards
224. Vimanarama - Grant Morrison & Philip Bond
225. Moomin Book Four: The Complete Tove Jansson Comic Strip - Tove Jansson & Lars Jansson
226. Their Finest Hour and a Half - Lissa Evans
227. The Naming of the Beasts - Mike Carey
228. Vampire Dance - Sergio Bleda
229. Stargate: Atlantis, Entanglement - Martha Wells

( Related Babblings )

I'm not actually finished with this site yet (there's content to be added and thanks to Dreamhost making unannounced changes I can't actually create any new owned fanlistings in my Enthusiast panel at the moment (it's currently using the settings for another fanlisting)) but I wanted to see what people thought about the layout since it's a bit different from what I usually do. I quite like it, but I've been staring at it for a few hours so fresh eyes are welcome. Feel free to offer any criticisms you might have!

Solitary Man, the fanlisting for Stargate: Atlantis 5.19, 'Vegas'.

On a related note, I'd also like to add a fanfic rec section to the fanlisting so does anyone have any Vegas!verse recs?

Remember: Detective John Motherfucking Sheppard doesn't know how to love you, but if he could he fucking would.

I just read a fic where John fucks Rodney with a ZPM and, quite frankly, I wish I could scrub the whole experience from my brain. (I mean, those things are HUGE and just ew. And also, no.)

I got crazy stalked at work today and it was not nearly as cool as I might have hoped. (I also wish I could scrub this experience from my brain.) More details on this later when I can stop feeling intensely uncomfortable about the whole thing.

I'm currently drinking an American beer called Brooklyn Lager which seems quite desperate to be taken seriously in the European market, but I gotta say: I'm not sold. I'm not quite sure what I think of it, but I'm leaning towards 'no' even though it is better than most American beers.

Today, I:
01. Had a day off.
02. Watched a bunch of SGA season two commentaries (oh, Joe Flanigan, what is with your laugh?).
03. Made this fanlisting.
04. Made fruit crumble and used way too much sugar. It still rocked though.
05. Started making new codes for this neglected fanlisting.

Tomorrow, I:
01. Have to go to work *insert frowny face of consternation here*
02. Will continue to make codes for this neglected fanlisting.
03. Am going to make Mexican lasagne.

On Friday:
01. chaletian's package arrived. Thanks, Liss! I'll get them sent back soon =)

It turns out that it's absolutely ages since I've posted about my amazing reading habits. So sad.

158. An American Dream - Norman Mailer
159. Salomé - Oscar Wilde & David Shenton
160. The Seventh Tower: The Fall - Garth Nix
161. Juliet of the Chalet School - Caroline German
162. Harlequinn Valentine - Neil Gaiman & John Bolton
163. Queen & Country (Definitive Edition), Volume 1 - Greg Rucka et. al.
164. Queen & Country (Definitive Edition), Volume 2 - Greg Rucka et. al.
165. A Woman In Berlin - Anonymous
166. Thicker Than Water - Mike Carey
167. A Disease of Language - Alan Moore & Eddie Campbell
168. The Vampire Diaries: The Awakening - L.J. Smith
169. The Vampire Diaries: The Struggle - L.J. Smith
170. The Vampire Diaries: The Fury - L.J. Smith
171. The Vampire Diaries: The Return - L.J. Smith
172. All Fires the Fire and Other Stories - Julio Cortázar
173. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Brontë
174. Something Wicked This Way Comes - Ray Bradbury
175. Northanger Abbey - Jane Austen
176. The Bloody Chamber - Angela Carter
177. The Lost World - Arthur Conan Doyle
178. The French Lieutenant's Woman - John Fowles
179. Tuned Out: The BBC's portrayal of lesbian and gay people - Katherine Cowan & Gill Valentine (Stonewall)
180. Wuthering Heights - Emily Brontë
181. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
182. Stardumb - John Defazio & Dave Hickey
183. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall - Anne Brontë
184. Villette - Charlotte Brontë
185. The Professor - Charlotte Brontë
186. Star Trek: The Next Generation, Section 31, Rogue - Andy Mangels & Michael A. Martin
187. Queen & Country (Definitive Edition), Volume 3 - Greg Rucka et. al.
188. Stargate: Atlantis, Blood Ties - Sonny Whitelaw & Elizabeth Christensen
189. Stargate: Atlantis, Mirror, Mirror - Sabine C. Bauer
190: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Proud Helios - Melissa Scott
191. Love Thy Neighbour: What people of faith really think about homosexuality - Ruth Hunt & Gill Valentine (Stonewall)
192. Rainbow City: Stories from Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Edinburgh - Ellen Galford & Ken Wilson (Remember When Project)
193. A Fistful of Rain - Greg Rucka
194. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society - Mary Ann Shaffer & Annie Barrows
195. Shooting at Midnight - Greg Rucka
196. The Maintenance of Headway - Magnus Mills
197. The Plain Janes - Cecil Castellucci & Jim Rugg

( Some thoughts and general ramblings )

EDIT: Holy cliffhanger, A Town Called Eureka!

01. I HAVE FINISHED THE RODNEY MCKAY FANLISTING! Well, I mean it's up and there are extras, but there are a billion more things I want to do which would all require rewatching SGA which is a time consuming proposition... ANYWAY, you can find the fanlisting at Mentally Unstable Like A Fox!, which has got to be one of the best lines ever uttered on TV ever.

02. Speaking of Rodney, now that A Town Called Eureka has established a bowling rivalry between Area 51 and Eureka I am totally imagining Rodney terrifying people through the medium of bowling. Awesome.

03. And speaking of A Town Called Eureka (which continues to be ace but I want more Zane please, and Taggart should come back, damnit), my flatmate, upon being confronted with the statement "He's so hot", reacted with "But he's old". This referenced Colin Ferguson and made me gasp with horror.

04. My foot is still all fucked up. It's so bruised that it looks dirty and it's still swollen. Swollen feet are weird. They look like fake, plastic feet. It has been suggested that I've probably sprained something, which is likely true. Shame on me and my drunken inability to walk down a hill.

05. I AM ON DAY TWO OF THREE CONSECUTIVE DAYS OFF, PEOPLE! IT IS A MIRACLE! A miracle that I have primarily been celebrating by working on the Rodney fanlisting and watching TV (today, some woman on Come Dine With Me made a Guinness punch which contained Guinness, raw eggs and condensed milk. I feel queasy just thinking about it). Tomorrow, and I make no promises, I MIGHT LEAVE THE FLAT *gasp*

Wow. So it was someone's leaving do last night and I got very drunk (and assumed control of the kitty which I can only hope I dispersed fairly at the end). I don't remember how I got home but I do remember falling down whilst walking towards the station and some guy trying to help me back up. Which is bad enough by itself but it turns out that in addition to a skinned knee, I've actually hurt one of my wrists and one of my feet. It's painful to walk. This is not a cool side effect of drinking.

Also, it's 7.32 and I think my hangover is starting to take effect *squints*

In happier news, I'm adopting the Rodney McKay fanlisting, which I still can't quite believe!

EDIT: Jesus, I'm so tempted to call in sick to work but I don't think "Sorry, can't work. Drunk." would be an acceptable excuse. Damn.

EDIT 2: I have also lost my voice. Super.

Since I cannot leave the house until the postman (actually, I think we have a postwoman) arrives, a meme! About Stargate! GOOD TIMES, PEOPLE!

( Ooooh, I wonder what it says! )

And then you break my fucking heart with a final episode that should have been at least three episodes and which contained more coincidences and improbable events than a Bronte book.

Stargate: Atlantis, you're a cruel, cruel programme.

(This entry was brought to you by episode 5.20 of SGA.)

HOLY SHIT, STARGATE: ATLANTIS!

I want to fuck Detective John Sheppard so bad. Good God. He's such an asshole and he's so fucked up and he's just utterly, utterly fuckable. But seriously now, how is Joe Flanigan so long and lean? Jesus.

The alternate realities! The soundtrack!! The Johnny Cash poster! The mindbending fuckability of Sheppard! GOD.

Is there fic continuing from where this episode left off? Because there better be.

(This entry was brought to you by episode 5.19 of SGA.)

Sheppard getting cockblocked by an extinct plant is possibly one of the best things ever. AND PARRISH! WHO LORNE WARNED SHEPPARD ABOUT! <3

The rest of the episode was completely blah though. Did anyone not see the hallucinations coming (especially the Zelenka one which I think they thought would be some kind of huge reveal)? And, seriously now, what was all that psychoanalysis bullshit between Sheppard and Kolya? Sheppard's totally fucked up, yes, but they missed the mark with that one.

Oh, Stargate: Atlantis, you torture me with your highs and lows! Your bonus character reintroductions and your shoddy writing!

(This entry was brought to you by episode 5.15 of SGA.)

There are a host of responsible adult type things that I should be doing right now (catching up on sleep, cleaning the bathroom, working out my finances, gathering the documents required to open a bank account, etc.).

Instead, I'm listening to my music just a shade to the side of too loud and reading SGA fanfic like it's going out of style. I've just finished one that made me laugh so much that I actually snorted.

Bang - Wherein Sheppard keeps walking into doors as a result of being back on Earth and forgetting they don't automatically respond to his thoughts, and people begin to suspect that McKay is beating him. Fucking HILARIOUS and you should read it even if you don't watch Stargate: Atlantis because it's just that good.

Stargate: Atlantis, you're breaking my freaking heart here.

( Cut because no one cares! )

In conclusion: Lorne.

01. Happy belated birthday to veraxia and th3newblack! veraxia, I have a gift in mind for you but I'm broke so it may be delayed (read: will be delayed). Sorry!

02. Never before in my life have I watched the weather forecast and willed the bands of rain to actually cover the city I'm living in. They didn't. They surrounded Glasgow like the fucking teases they are and I almost cried. TOO HOT. (Actually, it is cooler today. Thank fuck.)

03. Oh, Stargate: Atlanis, you are so strange. I still love half of you passionately and get really fucking annoyed at the other half. You SERIOUSLY lost your way in season three and didn't even give me enough Lorne to compensate. Dude, how much do I love Lorne? And he's not even in it that much but seriously, LOVE HIM. There was a run of really good episodes in season three (The Real World, Common Ground, Me and Mrs. Miller) but there was some real dross in there two. Besides which, I don't really care about the Wraith or the Replicators. And can we please stop having people immediately set themselves up as enemies when they're really on the same side as SGA? BORED NOW. Oh well, at least I got to see Lorne painting in Sunday (EVEN THOUGH OMG, CARSON!). Even though Elizabeth completely undermined herself time and time again, I'm not overly pleased with her replacement by Carter. I'm going to stop now because this is really disjointed and no one cares. YOU SHOULD, THOUGH!

04. I forgot to renew my domain and it expired last night. Ooops. It's fixed now though, so yay.

05. My work rang me this morning and my immediate thought was 'I'm DEFINITELY not supposed to be at work today!' followed by me panicking because I probably was (I wasn't. They wanted to know if I could do some overtime).

06. Barclay's fucked me over again earlier this week, so that's nice. I'm very not impressed and may have to kill them all.

07. I have lots of things to do today (including the Sam, Dean & Bobby fl) but I'm all muzzy and I just want to lie on my bed and do nothing. Because I'm so cool like that.

I have so many problems with the moral standpoint of Stargate: Atlantis, but I cannot stop watching it! The bits that I love kind of make up for the bits that appall me but it's the bits that appall me that have my brain running round in circle.

There are two categories to the things that appall me: the big ones (like, you know, Elizabeth thinking torture is perfectly acceptable and being backed up in this by Sheppard with the only dissenting voice being Rodney who really didn't dissent too much) and the smaller ones, by which I mean things that the programme doesn't acknowledge as a big deal (everyone being all lighthearted about the guy with six wives because now that they're not under his influence, they're probably going to divorce him. Ha ha! Actually, since he basically raped them repeatedly over a long period of time they might be entitled to do more than fucking divorce him, yes?).

But then you have the bits that I love like the snark and the humour and the illogical hair. Sheppard's a dangerous, dangerous man but I am won over by his surface layer entirely which is sad and makes me worry about my moral standards, really. And Rodney and Zelenka and Caldwell and Carson. CARSON! But, oh, Carson you speak so slowly for a Scot.

Some of the episodes are so lame, but some of them are brilliant. There's not nearly enough emotional carryover between episodes though which is a bit of a downer. I'm a fan of episodic television that you can watch out of order without things being unduly affected, but you can still carry stuff over. Like, Rodney's totally okay after almost drowning at the bottom of the sea? No emotional side effects to that at all? And Carson can just jump right back into field work after being held hostage be the de-Wraithified Wraiths? Really? And while I'm on this topic, I'm not so keen on how they've had all the sciencey people gun-happy. Yes, use a gun when necessary but you don't have to be so keen on it guys. God.

AND THEN THERE'S ALL THE FIC WHICH I CAN'T STOP READING AND WHICH HAS COMPLETELY DERAILED ME FROM J2 AND I EVEN SPENT MY WHOLE DAY AT WORK YESTERDAY WRITING LORNE/PARRISH IN REALLY SMALL HANDWRITING ON LOTS OF BITS OF PAPER AND DEFLECTING ALL THE QUESTIONS THAT CAME MY WAY AS A RESULT. OMG, I NEED HELP.

EDIT: Oh, also? I liked beardy!Sheppard and am highly unimpressed with the people who have said Joe Flannigan doesn't suit facial hair. DEMONSTRABLY UNTRUE!

Dear Diary,
I've fallen in love. His name is John Sheppard and he's the most amazing man there ever was. I love his face, his hair, his lips, his chest, his hands, his laconic voice (when he talks it's like forming words is almost too much effort and it makes everything he says sound positively post-coital). I want him to shoot at things more often. I want him to quirk his eyebrow all the time. Most of all, I want to have my wicked way with him and delight in the gloriousness of his being.
Lots of love, your awesomemest friend of awesome,
Lorraine

In other, less awesome news, I've spent the past three hours trying to reattach my curtain rail and it's just not happening. I HATE my curtain rail. It keeps thwarting me because it knows we have a flat inspection today and I have to go to work and I haven't been to sleep and I'm just about to go super fucking crazy.

(Query: In SGA why does Carson (Scotland is an acquired taste!) have a Scotland patch which is highly, highly unlikely, especially given that I've spied Union Jacks on some of the others?)